Posts tagged climate change

Involuntary Releases of Artistic Ignorance …

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Have you seen any of the recent “brain fart” commercial from kgb?

Check it out if you haven’t …

That one absolutely cracked me up … if for no other reason than I grew up hearing that term quite regularly (my dad often made a gallant effort at covering for my stupidity when Mom saw it for what it really was, “Naw, honey … the boy just had a brain fart, that’s all”).

Anyhow … I was actually trying to go somewhere with this thought …

Ah, yes … Global Warming, that was it … (I know, I know … the latest, PC euphemism is “climate change”)

Here recently, the Royal Academy (in the U.K.) opened a new display entitled, “Earth: Art of a Changing World.” The show is themed around global warming and the feature artist is Tracey Emin, age 46, pictured below with some of her recent work:

emin-1_1534672i

She looks overjoyed, does she not? I only wish I knew what was handwritten below those cheesy looking birds! (btw: is anyone even proud of the fact that I actually looked beyond the boobs and even noticed the penciled writing? Granted, my initial thought was, “does that say, ‘now go throw your semen at any one’ … ???”)

But anyhow …

So, what REALLY crossed my mind was, why was the lovely Tracey Emin chosen as the featured artist? As fate would have it, I stumbled across an explanation in her own words mere moments later …

I’m not a good person. I’m a bad advert. I take too many planes… I keep my heating on all day and night because I get really cold and I’m scared of the dark so I sleep with the light on”

I see … it all makes perfect sense now. (if you were here with me now, you’d surely notice my left eyelid twitching … albeit mildly, but twitching all the same)

. . .

. . .

The lovely miss Emin is not the only artist on display … also included are works by the likes of Antony Gormley …

gormley_1534677i

And yes, I’m crapping you negative … the display, entitled, “Amazonian Field”, is comprised of nothing more than hundreds upon hundreds of retarded looking clay figures that fill a more-than-modest sized room.

Ya know, I could sum up this whole matter of Global Warming AND modern “art” with the following masterpiece:

bullshit_pile

(yes, that IS a massive pile of cow patties … or, in the common vernacular, a GIANT PILE OF BULL SHIT!)

And yes, I also realize that the terms “cow” and “bull” are not entirely interchangeable. This is doubly true when it comes to the matter of milking …

BUT ANYHOW …

. . .

I hope you’ve been enjoying the recent entries from Buck’s World’s newest resident alien, Nuthin. I’ve known our flack jacketed super-hero at a distance for … well, it’s been a few years now, I suppose … and, for whatever reason, it wasn’t until I made the break from MySpace that he and finally hit it off.

And yes, there’s a reason I mention him … in fact, I would like to think that I rarely blather without a purpose. In fact, one of my most over-used lines over the years when I’ve hosted various interactive type forums was, “The point here is to have a point.” My good friend Emma might remember that line being used when we hosted a show on the MPlayer network. People that were being moronic, or just being otherwise pointless, would hear parting words, “Hey, @$$hole, the point here is to HAVE A POINT!”

At which point the room moderator (aka: the acting Evil Overlord) would drop the gavel and terminate that person’s connection to our audio “chat room.”

Good times! … Good times, indeed.

But anyhow …

My buddy, Nuthin, in a moment of “ebrius prudentia” closed his last blog post with:

Epilepsy-Seize The Day

Which, yet again, caused me to drift back to days gone by.

Any of you remember the Little Caesars pizza joints?

little-caesars-logo

There was cute little cartoon dude in the Roman get-up that’d blurt out, “PIZZA! PIZZA!” at the end of the commercials?

Well … years ago, I was having one of my little “twitch moments” … a phenomenon that the Spousal Unit applies the euphemism “inner chill” when she has one … whilst watching that same commercial … and I was, at once, smitten with the idea for my OWN little chain of pizza and sandwich shops!

little-seizures-logo. . .

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuut anyhow …

. . .

Since twitching and seizures seems to have become the theme du jour …

Have you heard about the performance artist / actress in the U.K. who willingly went off of her epilepsy meds a little under a month ago? Yeah, seriously … she’s grown rather appalled at the “rubber necking” mentality and the — as she refers to it — “voyeuristic nature” of people who Google or YouTube epileptic seizures.

Again, I am CRAPPIN’ YOU NEGATIVE!

Samantha-Fox-500x819-82kb-media-133-media-0107

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPS …

Sorry, sorry … wrong picture. This is about epileptics, seizures and all of that other good, fun stuff … not camel toes and buxomality …

This part of the story is about Rita Marcalo …

epileptic_1526901c(wow, talk about going from one extreme to another …)

Here’s the deal … Rita Marcalo (said performance artist / dancer / actress) has stopped taking her epilepsy medication for the express purpose of a production she has loving titled … wait for it ..

WAIT FOR IT …

Involuntary Dances.

Yup, once again, I am crappin’ you negative!

She claims she is doing this to “raise awareness of the condition.”

She will use strobe lighting, fasting and raising her body temperature to try and bring about a seizure. People are invited to film her at the theatre in the U.K. where she will be … uh … “performing” these involuntary dances.

Miss Marcalo was quoted as saying:

“One of the reasons I am doing this is because epilepsy is an invisible disability. As an artist I am very interested in this idea of doing something in my art that is the opposite of what I do in my life. In my own life it is private but in art I make it public.

“If you Google or YouTube `epileptic seizures’ you come up with all kinds of mobile phone footage which has been filmed without the patients’ consent. Part of me doing this is to address the voyeurism. I am saying, I am choosing to let you do this.”

The audience, restricted to people over the age of 18, will be provided with sleeping bags and breakfast and — get this — will be woken by a siren the moment she suffers a seizure so they can record it on their mobile phones.

Oh, and did I mention that she this “performance art” is being funded by a $23,000 grant?

And I can’t get research funding to drink beer and burp my worm???

Wow …

. . .

And finally … in recognition the hard work that the modern day school system invests in blowing smoke into orifices where smoke simply does not belong … check out this little gem that was sent to the parents of students of a Bacalava, Ontario school’s the 7th grade science class:

Dear parent/Guardians,

The Grade 7 Science classes are nearing the completion for the unit Pure Substances and Mixtures. In this unit, students have been introduced to the Particle Theory of Matter, and to some of the terminology related to the field of chemistry. They have also been given the opportunity to explore, and conduct experiments related to the properties of solutions and mechanical mixtures.

At this time all students are encouraged to discuss with you the content and expectations of the culminating task along with how it will be assessed. This culminating task allows students to demonstrate the knowledge and skills that he/she has learned throughout the module. Although students are responsible to independently complete this task, we would very much appreciate your assistance for the experimenting component, as students require access to a kitchen and some ingredients to develop their own mixture.

Thank you in advance for your interest and co-operation.

Translation: The children were making cupcakes at home as their “science project.”

. . .

Which brings us right back to where we started: Brain Farts and bull shit …

. . .

Until next time, sports fans …

Wait: speaking of bull shit, I’d like you to SERIOUSLY reconsider all the shit we’ve been force fed about this so-called “man made climate change” … remember the crap about how HUMANS are somehow pushing polar bears to the brink of extinction? As it turns out, that too was total and complete bovine excrement as well. Most populations are growing … and those that aren’t are currently engaged in brutal acts of cannibalism!

Don’t believe me?

Well, in that case …

PEACE OFF, FAUX CURSE!

POLAR-BEAR_1539105i

Banal Lube

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I realize this goofy pun of a title doesn’t pronounce quite right, but that, too, can be a wonderful part of the written word; visually, the double-entendre still works, if only for a brief moment.

But anyhow …

Today’s little forray into the strange and scarely explored land of common sense is brought to you by the letter “O” …

But we’ll get back to that in a little while …

What the hell happened to the world while I was away for a few days with my sons?

We now have terrorists who were transferred from Guantanamo Bay to enjoy their “constitutional right” of facing their accuser in a court of law in New York City. Meanwhile, we have three Navy SEAL’s being arraigned the week after next for allegedly “abusing” a terrorist they captured back in September.

The captured terrorist was Ahmed Hashim Abed, the mastermind behind the ambush of four Blackwater employees in Iraq in 2004 who were transporting supplies for a catering company when they were ambushed and killed. Their bodies were subsequently burned and then dragged through the city of Fallujah. Two of the bodies were finally hung on a bridge over the Euphrates River.

fallujah-2004-Blackwater-contractors

Here’s the real kicker: the detainee was originally turned over to Iraqi authorities, to whom Abed filed the abuse complaints. He was later returned to American custody. Something tells me the Iraqi authorities sort of expected this “problem” to simply go away, but noooooooo … terrorists have rights too, dontcha know?

The complaint filed claims that while being apprehended, Abed was punched in the stomach and also had a bloodied lip.

I’m crapping you negative.

W … T … F ?!?!?!?!?!?!

Global War … er, I mean, Climate Change, Update …

After years of being bullied and silenced by the forces of political correctness, more and more prominent scientists are standing up and exposing the hoax that is global warming.

Before I blather into my next diatribe, there IS something I want you to carry away from this short segment:

Polar core samples have unequivocally proven that carbon dioxide levels FOLLOW periods of global warming rather than precede them.

ANYHOW … the “Greenies” are, much like their icon Al Gore, not the type to allow little annoyances such as the facts to get in the way. According to Lachezar Filipov, deputy director of the Space Research Institute of the Bulgarian Academy of Sciences, Bulgarian government scientists have been in contact with extra-terrestrial aliens.  He claims that the aliens are currently in the process of answering 30 different questions that have been posed to them.

In fact, these researchers are currently analyzing 150 crop circles from around the world, which they believe are attempts by said aliens to answer said 30 questions.

Mr. Filipov told Bulgarian media, “Aliens are currently all around us, and are watching us all the time.”

alien-10

Great, as if Santa weren’t bad enough, we got some creepy-ass aliens watching us all the time too????

Filipov blathered on, “They are not hostile towards us, rather, they want to help us but we have not grown enough in order to establish direct contact with them.”

Haven’t grown enough? Do tell, Mr. Filipov, whatsoever do you mean?

According to Mr. Filipov, the extraterrestrials are critical of humanity’s “interference in nature’s processes.”

Really now?!??! [insert Sam Kinison-like chuckle here]

Are you even believing this shit?

On the lighter side …

bear-finn_switzerland

The moron pictured above (no, not the bear) decided he wanted to have a picnic with the bear (also pictured above). Turns out the bear was none to fond of his advances and forthwith began to summarily maul said uninvited picniceer.

(yeah, I went there … “picniceer”)

Police quickly responded by shooting the bear with numerous fragmentation rounds, thusly killing the bear.

Police and zoo officials say there has been an outpouring of public sympathy – for the bear.

I hope you caught the post from our newest blogger, Nuthin. Scroll down to the next article and give it a read. Oh, and make sure to leave a comment too, will ya?

Well, I should be getting along now. The boys should be done with their outing with Grandmom any time now. I cannot believe they have faced the slings and arrows of these mentally deranged “Black Friday” shoppers.

black-friday_1532109i

Sorry Mom … but it had to be said.

What better way to commemorate the only legitimate holiday left on the calendar, huh? We go from thanking God for all of the goodness in our life to a day filled with insane, angry shoppers everywhere looking for a “bargain.” Maybe the Jews are somehow behind all of this.

Who knows?

(Juuust kidding … I mean, hey … Jesus was a Jew too, ya know? Surely, a follower of the Son of God Himself (me == wayward follower) is not going to implicate himself / myself with such baseless accusations.

Or would I?

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