Posts tagged party in my mouth
Almost everyone knows at least one of the countless multitudes of “Little Johnny” jokes that have been circulating since time immemorial … you know, the quick-witted schoolboy who’s always the bane of his hapless teacher.
Well, it would appear that a young couple in the U.K. have spawned one of their own. Certain other news agencies have clamored and prattled on about yet another Brit prodigy. Many are calling young Oscar Wrigley, age 2, “Baby Einstein.”
Well, after doing a little investigative research of my own, I want to be amongst the first cry, “Bovine Excrement!”
(hey, my family sometimes reads these things, I have to at least make some effort at a modicum of decency)
But anyhow …
Seems little Oscar knocked the ball out of the park, dusting the upper limits of the Stanford-Binet test, which they say cannot measure higher than 160. This places our 2 year old little protagonist in the 99.99th percentile of the world population.
So … you may be thinking … why would Buck even THINK of making the “Little Johnny” reference? Well, as it turns our, here is what news reports are crediting as the flags that triggered the little boy’s parents to have him tested in the first place.
According to reports, Oscar’s father Joe Wrigley, 29, an IT specialist from Reading in Berkshire, was quoted as saying: “Oscar was recently telling my wife about the reproductive cycle of penguins.
Strike One! Little Johnny is INFAMOUS for his lewd references and sexual innuendo.
But, let’s not jump to conclusions, right?
The dad went on to say, “He is always asking questions. Every parent likes to think their child was special but we knew there was something particularly remarkable about Oscar. I’m fully expecting the day to come when he turns around and tells me I’m an idiot.”
Strike TWO!!!!!! Little Johnny’s reputation for veiled abuse and condescending behavior is legendary!
But alas, I kept reading … whereupon I came across a quote by the mother of the beast … er, I mean, boy … Hannah, age 26, who said: “His vocabulary is amazing. He’s able to construct complex sentences.”
Hmm, I thought to myself … that’s rather impressive. Hoping to be impressed I pressed forward with my reading …
“The other day he said to me, ‘Mummy, sausages are like a party in my mouth’.”
BINGO! Strike three, Sparky …. YOU’RE OUT!